Internal Struggle

I'm having one. Jason and I live in a lovely little ( little being the operative word) half double. It's a great little place, good location, good landlord, big backyard, but, it isn't ours. If you've read from the beginning, you'll know that I did have a house, and I don't anymore (if you haven't read that look at posts tagged evil, and the big b). This brings me to my struggle and stress. We would like to buy a house, someday. Someday meaning in the next few years. With the economy going in a swirly pattern, I'm really concerned that this will be a real problem. We're working to pay off other debts, but we really don't have many. Just the cars, and one big student loan with my name on it( I worry about that one too). I may have found a forgiveness program for part of that, but I don't know yet. I'm just really worried that we won't ever be able to buy a house. I'm worried that this will de-rail the rest of our lives. I worry about it all the time. But then, sometimes, I get that little feeling, that maybe, just maybe things will work out and we'll be fine. I'm not at all sure though. We don't want a mansion, just a house. Something not in a subdivision. Something that has potential to be our family's home. And I feel sometimes, that through student loans and bad economy, it won't happen.